Really awful. Apparently we failed our apartment inspection because my room is an awful mess that the health department threatened to close down the entire apartment - I have to clean it in two weeks, but that's not a big deal, my mom offered to help me, we could do it in a day.
What is a big deal is that we failed our inspection because of...Sullivan, my guinea pig. We have to get rid of him in 14 days, and I have no idea what to do with him. He's 3 years old, so all the stores and shelters here would just put him down, and I cannot live with myself if that happens. I need to find a home for him that's local, so I'm in trouble, and so is he. God, why does our society have to murder animals like they're property to be tossed away? You wouldn't euthanize an old person because nobody wants one, that would be cruel. But that's how things work, and now he needs a place to live. He's well-tempered but has never had a cage-mate, or at least, not since he was 4 weeks old, so his chances are not good. (They get nervous around other guinea pigs when they get older and used to their own space.) I cannot imagine this house without him squeaking every time someone opens the fridge or if he hears my cousin's loud-ass music outside and thinks he's coming upstairs. And to top it off, I am not social, I barely know anyone, and I doubt they'd be interested in a pet, especially since he isn't exactly low-maintenance. (They need people to interact with them, they're very social.) I'd be more content to give him away if I knew he'd be cared for and not killed.
The other thing is that, according to the rules of our lease, it's questionable whether you can go to college and live out here at the same time, I don't know what we're going to do if we have to move, we've lived out here for over a decade. This is an uncertainty, not an absolution, but my mother was so excited about college and finally completing her mastery and she might have to give that up because of some stupid rules. This is America, when has it ever been acceptable for a person to be denied education for any goddamn reason? And what am I supposed to do? Now I might not even be able to correct my Fs next semester. On the up-side, if we have to move, maybe we can keep Sully, but that would be short notice. We've never been evicted from any place we've lived before, and now both our lives have turned into a nightmare.
It doesn't even matter what I think of this, in the next two weeks, everything will be decided for me. I'm just hoping I can change that for the better, this is as real as shit's ever gotten for me.
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